Chris’ battle for his life and my sister-in-law’s circumstance, along with living life, left me drained of all energy by the the second week of January of 2001. After Chris’ memorial events had passed in calendar, I quickly began to notice that:
- I couldn’t focus or concentrate like I used to.
- I hardly had the energy to get out of bed most mornings.
- Emotions were right below the surface, exploding through seemingly at their own will and whim.
I related it this way: “If burnout is real, I am probably as close to being burned out as one could possibly be.” I knew I needed some rest, and soon, or I would in trouble.
What I didn’t know, but would soon discover, was that I was already in trouble. I wasn’t just close to burnout, I was IN burnout.
Quick arrangements were made to take the month of February off. Living right next door to the church would mean I needed to be away from home for most of that time.
Almost two weeks at my parent’s home in Hawaii, a weekend with my wife in Santa Barbara, a few days at home, a long weekend at my in-laws place (one of the most restful places for me … really) with Colleen and the kids, and a week at a Pastors Retreat Center with Colleen that turned out to be like a plush Bed & Breakfast for Pastors. That was an itinerary from heaven. WHO, in their right mind, would come back from that schedule and NOT be refreshed and ready to go back to work?
Well, that would be me!
© 2008 Paul D. Kuzma